Crucified

John 13:37 - Peter said to Jesus, "Why can't I follow you now? I would give my life for you."

Fear makes us say strange things sometimes. Peter - and maybe the other disciples and followers - is scared of losing Jesus. How will they be able to carry on without him? What will happen to them? Jesus has been keeping them safe by refuting the rhetoric and logic-traps of the Pharisees. With Jesus gone, who will protect them?

It seems Peter, here at least, has finally accepted Jesus' death as inevitable, but is still not prepared for the way Jesus wants him to "give his life for him." Peter is thinking of dying, Jesus is thinking of living a life dedicated to the movement Jesus has started. He can give his life by dying, but who benefits from that? Jesus wants Peter, the others disciples, and us to give our lives by living for Christ; by loving others and advocating with those who have little power, as Jesus has consistently done. And for which he was tortured and killed by the Roman government.

Just as there are many ways we as Christians can betray Christ, there are many ways we can give our lives for Christ. Being a pastor, priest, or servant of the church is one way. Yet, service in the world is where many of us are called to serve. Jesus calls each of us to our own vocations of service. Maybe we've heard this call and are reluctant to follow for whatever reason. (I don't blame you; it's a scary thing to give over your life without knowing where you will end up.) It's okay to say no, to take our time. When we're ready, our invitation will still be good. Jesus never stops calling us, inviting us to follow.

On this day, as we remember the cruel crucifixion of Christ, let us also remember the ways we have not lived for him, the ways we ourselves have crucified him and continue to crucify him over and over again. Let us close our Lenten fasts and meditations by repenting of these actions, but also by reflecting on where Christ's crucifixion is leading us.

Christ, have mercy on us.