Pride

Matthew 20:23 - "You will indeed drink my cup but to sit on my right and on my left is not mine to give, but those for whom it has been prepared by my father."

I want to revisit this because I have been thinking of pride in relation to this pericope. There is a difference between the brothers' ambitious pride that leads them to do a foolish thing, being proud of things about ourselves we have no control over, and being proud of things we have worked to accomplish. So often we in the church forget these differences 0 especially when it comes to how we see women and people of colors.

James and John were exhibiting overweening pride and ambition. They were asking not only to be placed above their fellows, but also they were asking for honors which they hadn't yet earned. This is the kind of ambition and pride that tend to gloat over others' losses or lesser status. This is the kind of ambition that turns to ashes in our mouths. Look at Trump and his crew. When a person does anything to get what they want, the illegal things eventually catch up to them. In Trump's case, he is also enabling Republicans to try and enact their evil, wicked economic policies of taking from the poor and giving to the rich.

Next to this anti-Robin Hood ambition and pride stand pride over things we cannot control, such as our skin color, our country of birth, our talents, our looks, our families. Sure, we can be proud of our country when it acts in a manner deserving of pride. We can be proud of our heritage insofar as it has been ethical and moral. We can be proud of our work to develop our talents. In other words, we can be proud of actions taken.

When I began the process of becoming a minister, I was given a psych test of 150 questions, most of them along the lines of, "I have been on the cover of 30 magazines this month." Easily answered, if one is reasonably sane and honest. (I suspect Trump would fail this test on honesty grounds alone.) One of the things that the doctor and I discussed was a question about pride. The question on the test said something like, "I am proud of things I've accomplished." This disturbed the doctor. I stated bluntly that I saw no reason not to be proud of things I've done. I had just graduated college as outstanding senior - a thing I didn't know existed and yet I earned it anyway. I worked for that honor. The doctor was not convinced. Thinking about it this morning, I realize that there was probably some sexism involved in his attitude. As a woman, he didn't think I should be proud. Either that or he concatenated the three forms of pride into one. An unholy trinity. Regardless, women in our society are punished for being proud of our accomplishments, for being ambitious, for speaking out. Men are rewarded for these actions.

It is clear to me that that doctor's personal opinion got in the way of his better judgement. I hurt no one. Being proud of one's accomplishments is worlds away from being proud of things one can't control, and both are different from being so proud and ambitious that we hurt our relationships with others and with God. This is as true for women and people of colors as it is for men. It's time that we started to push back against those who would try to oppress women just because they are women, to push back against those who try to oppress people of colors just because they are not white, to push back against those who try to oppress anyone who is "different."