More Righteous than the Pharisees

Matthew 5:20-22 - For I say to you that unless your righteousness exceeds that of the Pharisees, you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven. You have heard it said of old that you shall not murder. But I say that whoever becomes angry with his brother is liable to judgment, and if you insult your brother you will be liable to the Sanhedrin, and if you say, "you fool," you will be liable to the gehenna of fire.

So, the law will not pass away, but rather the requirements of the law are extended. We must go beyond the minimum wording of the law and look at its spirit. The spirit that enlivens these laws is the image of God in all people. When we become angry, insult our neighbors, and dismiss others as stupid (something I do a lot of!) we are acting against the law and its spirit. We are harming ourselves, our relationships and ultimately, our community by acting in these ways.

I have heard that anger is a sign of fear or sadness. In thinking about my own pervasive anger lately, I am uncertain whether it is fear or sadness. Maybe both. Right now we are in a money crunch because of the kitchen renovations and our renters pulling out. I am doing what I can and so is Peter. I am fearful of being in this position.





We are wanting to move to Cleveland and are colliding over how to accomplish that. We agreed at the beginning of the year to sell the condo and Peter keeps wanting to change the plan. He does not want to make Mike accountable for the money he owes the condo association. He does not want to sell the condo - wants to have Mike rent it out for us. He does not want to use a realtor to sell the condo, yet he has no set plan for selling it ourselves. It appears he is not ready to move to Cleveland. I have explained all this to him but he cannot see it. So I am fearful that he will sabotage his desire to move and I am fearful we will lose even more money in the process. I am saddened that he seems sad. He has not been seeing anyone since Greg retired and I am fearful he is sliding back into old, bad patterns.

So, although I am angry and disappointed (he seems to forget that the third floor is bad for my health), I am going to do what I need for me. I told him that we will talk on Thursday. If he has no plan or is still in the same spot, I am going to start moving downstairs on Friday. I am not his hostage. I have agency and I am going to use it.

The money situation is a little more difficult to get past. I was looking for jobs and realize I will need two more CPE units to qualify for Chaplain positions. So, I talked with Peter and signed up for another round. One way or another we will make this work.

So, this particular passage helps remind me that Peter is struggling too. He has a few more emotional hurdles than I do and in moving downstairs, I am giving him time and space (emotional space) to figure it out. I mean I will not be continually in his face about this issue. He really does not want to even talk about our next step. He would rather try to think through every single scenario first. So, let him. I'm going to do what works for me. In the meantime, I am taking care of my own needs. I am choosing to not be angry with him.

Does that make me more righteous than the Pharisees?
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