Betrayal

Matthew 26:20-21 – When it was evening, he sat at the table with the twelve disciples, and as they were eating, he said, “Truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me.”

One of you will betray me. Literally, hand me over (to be killed).

I confess I’ve had a hard time with this passage. There is so much betrayal in the news on a daily basis. Betrayal of citizens by trying to cast out their votes. Betrayal of refugees by family separation and concentration camps at the border and elsewhere. Betrayal by inaction – by not doing anything about the coronavirus at the federal and sometimes the state level. Betrayal by lies, by not accepting the results of the election, by court cases, by election fraud, by every deed Donald does and every word that comes out of his mouth. By Republicans whether silent or enthusiastically in support of Donald. Betrayal incitement of a mob to storm the Capitol building. Our president has betrayed all of us numerous times in order to stay in power. Then yesterday – the worst betrayal of all.

My hope for you and all of us is to give ourselves permission to feel how we feel about it. Give ourselves time to lament and to grieve. Give ourselves time and space to breathe. In times like this, that alone can feel like a betrayal on our part. But in times like this, when the government has left us all to swing in the breeze, that self-care is an act of resistance, to quote Audre Lorde.

In normal times, I’d focus more on the ways we betray Christ ourselves by betraying others. And we do and we should look at that. But these are not normal times. These are times in which we are all traumatized in varying degrees. And the trauma will continue for some time – even after Donald is removed from office. This is true whether that removal comes in thirteen days or sooner. Just as we don’t ask people who are currently in any sort of crisis to examine their part (if any) until it is safe, so I will not focus on how we might be betraying others. The time is not yet right.

With one exception. I would ask that we take note of the Capitol Police’s deferential handling of these white insurrectionists. That is not the reality of many Black people, brown people, LGBTQ+ people, disabled people, and especially those who have more than one of these life circumstances. They would have been (and in fact have been in the past!) shot at with tear gas, flash bangs, and rubber and perhaps even real bullets. When we are able to go out freely again, let us not return to this extremely unjust normal but rather work for a society that everyone can feel safe in, can succeed in, and can call home.

For now, let’s take care of ourselves and care for others as much as we can. 

B