No!

Matthew 25:9 – And the wise answered the foolish, “No! There will not be enough for you and for us. You had better go to the dealer and by some for yourselves.”

Many people have a super hard time telling another person no, especially if the person is with us. It’s easier when we don’t have to see the disappointment in their eyes or hear it in their voice. We generally don’t want to disappoint others. I’m sure the foolish bridesmaids were disappointed by this answer, yet the wise bridesmaids are adamant. The Greek expression leaves no doubt whatsoever. 

In addition to their preparation for obstacle, their ability to correctly assess the situation and refuse the request makes them wise. They are not refusing the request because they feel put out. They are refusing because there is not enough oil to go around. If they had acquiesced, they would all have been left in the dark. How many times have we acquiesced or been talked into something against our better judgement and been “left in the dark?” How many times have we compromised our own self-care because some one else requested a favor? How many times have we tried to squeeze just one more thing in our day?

Of course, there are times when our own desires and needs should be put aside temporarily. No one can go through life solely thinking of their own comfort and security. That would be a lonely way to live. Going overboard by trying to help everyone who asks without the judgment the wise bridesmaids exhibit in the parable will get us pulled thinner and thinner in many directions. Either way, we lose our center. 

One easy way to address this tendency, if we have it, is to notice why we are saying yes to someone. Of course, this only works if we are willing to be open to the truth. Today, let’s notice why we decide to take action.

B