Running on Empty

Matthew 25:8 – “Then the foolish bridesmaids said to the wise bridesmaids, “Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.”

One thing I didn’t discuss regarding verse 5 is that the bridesmaids were sleeping, something Jesus is warning his disciples against. They were not prepared and ready for the bridegroom. This is especially true for those who brought no oil with them. Had they not been sleeping they could have spent the time acquiring oil. Instead, they slept. And while none of them should have been sleeping, the wise bridesmaids get off without condemnation, and the foolish ones are left without enough oil. 

How often do we run ourselves down without replenishing our oil? How often do we think we can do just one more thing and find out we’ve gone too far? American culture doesn’t exactly encourage treating ourselves and our bodies with love. We’re more likely to use the phrase “no pain, no gain,” than to recognize our need for rest and replenishment. To the extent that I am good at knowing when to stop, it’s because lupus makes it necessary to do so. I’ve had thirty years’ experience! And it is still hard. My desires for ministry, travel, work, entertainment far outstrip my ability to participate fully in them. I understand wanting to do more than is wise.

I think part of being prepared for Jesus’ return or death or however the Holy Spirit will disrupt our lives, is taking care of our bodies, our minds, and our spirit. We are not machines built to run 24 hours a day. We have limits, and so often we want to ignore those limits for a variety of reasons. In the short term this isn’t usually a problem. It becomes a problem when such activity becomes our lifestyle. If we are not worn out physically, spiritually, and mentally, it will be easier to deal with a car that suddenly stops working, or a death in the family, or any sort of bad news. It will even be easier for us to celebrate good news. It will be easier to accept the disruption of the Holy Spirit in our lives. We will find ourselves more open to people and circumstances when we are not running on empty or low on fuel.

Maybe today is a good to check in with our bodies, and ask ourselves where we might be low on oil.

B

Disruption

Matthew 25:7 – “Then all the bridesmaids woke up and trimmed their lamps.”

Trimmed their lamps. Lamps were small vessels holding oil with a spout that holds the wick. To trim a lamp, one would cut the end of the wick so the lamp burns clean and bright. Wicks that are not tended to in this way burn dim and smoky. Perhaps it’s no coincidence that one of the definitions of the verb used for “trimmed” is “to set in order.” It is related to the word for the world and the universe, cosmos. 

Matthew has been talking about being prepared, having our things in order, for the return of Jesus – or death, whichever comes first. There is a lot of emphasis, especially in the Presbyterian church, on decency and order, as Paul wrote. I think maybe too much. The Holy Spirit is into upsetting the order, working to disrupt our notions of order and decency rather than following it. Paul was writing to people who thought the time was so short that some people wouldn’t die before being taken to heaven. In that sense, decency and order was a survival technique. 

All through the Bible God upsets humanity’s order. The example I used the other day was God’s choosing the younger son to inherit rather than the older – there are also stories of God convincing men that women should inherit if there is no son or other heir. The story of the garden and Adam and Eve eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil is a disruption of order. Yet, if they had not eaten the fruit we would still be in that garden. It would be a kind of heaven, especially for those who have been oppressed by systems and cultures. But the story is an etiology to explain why human beings have consciousness and animals don’t seem to. (They do. And the story is more complex.) God put the tree there so that we would upset the order. It doesn’t take a genius to realize that putting the tree there would lead to their eating it. 

But here, Jesus is preaching about having everything ready. Maybe he’s not talking about material things? Maybe he’s talking about our hearts and minds. To have our hearts and minds ready or prepared for Jesus implies that they will upset the order of patriarchy, bigotry, racism, sexism, homophobia, and ableism – there are many ways and “reasons” to oppress others. God upsets the order of human society. She disrupts our orderly ways. We fear such disruption; it often means a change in lifestyle, and we don’t interpret that for the better. We often would rather be comfortable in what security we have than follow where we think God is calling. At least, I would. 

But without disruption our lives will never get better, nor will the lives of those who are living in shelters or on the streets. Unless we disrupt our lives, we will never be able to make others’ lives better. Because improvement requires that we who have homes, jobs, and security give some of that up so others can simply eat or have one home. Improvement in the social order causes change, requires changing how we live together as people in a community. It requires recognition that we are all interconnected. It requires rich people to “sell all they have and give it to the poor.” It requires that we love our neighbor as much as we love ourselves and God. 

We are failing that in the US. Too many of us are not willing to risk our comfort so that others might have a better life. Until we are, nothing will change. We will continue to have government officials propose that we should use jails and prisons for sheltering the homeless so that the police can “clean up the streets.” Rather than figuring out a way to provide for everyone, our current administration would rather criminalize difference, criminalize chaos, criminalize the Holy Spirit’s disruptions into our world.

What are we willing to give up so that others may have their fair share? Are we willing to let the Spirit disrupt our lives?

B

Sleeping

Matthew 25:6 – “But at midnight there was a shout, ‘Look! Here is the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.’”

There is a saying that we find love when we’re not looking for it. There are times that love comes to us unexpectedly. So do many things; illness, accidents, job loss, promotions, babies, and death to name a few. Here in our text, the bridesmaids were waiting for the groom, but were sleeping. I spent quite a lot of my time in life sleeping – not literally, but metaphorically. Sleep walking through life.

I spent my twenties, thirties and forties traveling around the Southwest US as well as to other countries. I love going to new places and seeing new things. I’m glad I did because traveling costs me physically now. I’m not old, I have lupus. Traveling requires lots of sunscreen and prednisone as well as time to recuperate when I get back. It’s quite rough on my body and my mind. Yet there are still reasons to travel – my niece getting married being one. That’s why I’m so glad I was able to do all that traveling while younger. Going to a foreign country would be really rough. It would take a lot for me to get on that plane now. 

Given that, I want to write about illness and death as surprises. I was in my twenties and living in Japan when I began to be symptomatic. I was symptomatic as a child, but no one knew what was wrong, why I was getting so many headaches. It really hit when I returned to the US; I could no longer ignore it. Hearing the news was depressing – I was only 30 years old. It felt like my life was over. I was lucky, my doctors believed me. I’m still lucky – I have no organ involvement. Lupus will not kill me, just make going outside a pain in the ass. But I didn’t know any of that at first. No one knows how an illness will affect us physically.

Just as illness seems remote when we’re healthy, death seems remote when we’re young. It doesn’t seem remote to me now. It simultaneously feels as though there wasn’t enough time and that I’m okay with dying. Mind you, I’m not okay with my husband dying. 😊 Just as the bridesmaids were awakened by the appearance of the groom, we will all be awakened one day to the reality of our own death. And like the coming of Jesus, we don’t know the day or the hour. 

It might feel strange to say live so you’ll have a good death, but I think that’s what life is; preparing for death. If we have not slumbered through life, we will probably have fewer regrets. I won’t be able to do the traveling I did even five years ago, but I have no regrets. My life has a different focus today; a focus it should have had all along. That is to do what I can for others rather than myself. The things I am involved in here in Cleveland are food to my soul in the same way that traveling was back in the day. I am very grateful to say that if I died tomorrow, I would have few regrets about my life. I realize not many people can say that.

If you’re one of those people, there’s still time to change it if you wish. Maybe today is a good day to think about what gives meaning to our lives and how that relates to our deaths. There’s no time like the present.

B